say these phrases out loud and change your life

Here is the deal.
I want YOU, dear reader, to choose one or more of these
phrases writ here below.
I want you to go out and drop one of them into
a conversation or just blurt it out randomly
in the bus queue or wherever.
Try to add a little expresiveness when you say it.
Why, you may ask, should I want to do a daft thing like that?
Well, I would reply, because it could crack a hole in the mundane
shell and allow Blakean reveries safe passage into our realm
where they can practice great Karmic magic, help to raise
conciousness of our higher purpose , that being
to feed our collective godhead through sublime fits of ecstatic hysteria.
This is the antidote to war.
Come on do it!!
You might have fun too ;-)

1. I couldn't give a nun's crispy cunt what you think.

2. I'd rather eat a wet sandwich.

3. Would you like to see my collection of butchers hooks?

4. I'd trot a pony up Highbury Fields for ha'penny.

5. We sent blind Alf Hang-gliding.

6. Twenny kilo of copper bolts for the pressure cooker please luv.

7. Howz about a drizzling o' hot suet in yer furry leotard?

8. I'd swap a dozen hairlip albinos for a cucumber.

9. I'd slide a fiver through the gates of Timbuktu for that.